Keep it up

Philippians 2:12-13
What I'm getting at, friends, is that you should simply keep on doing what you've done from the beginning. When I was living among you, you lived in responsive obedience. Now that I'm separated from you, keep it up. Better yet redouble your efforts. Be energetic in your life of salvation, reverent and sensitive before God. That energy is God's energy, and energy deep within you. God himself willing and working at what will give him the most pleasure.

The last few days I have felt a physical exhaustion that is getting the best of me. I'm still not sleeping as well as I should--better than last week, but not great. I was too busy this past weekend; I didn't get much time to just relax. Now I know why--I should be asking for God's energy not my own strength. I can't seem to pray like I used to. My prayers now are for the immediate just like my life has been for the past month. It is October 20, the calendar anniversary of Jason's death. He died on Sept. 20, so we have now made it through the four Saturday nights anniversary and the one month anniversary.
Life has continued all around us, and we have been a part of it and separate from it. I can't explain that, but I feel like I'm an outsider in this world right now. My mind doesn't focus like it should. Continue to pray for me--that I will get God's energy.