Friday, February 27, 2009

Offering Sympathy

Very soon after Jason was killed, a woman who had lost a son four years ago began emailing me. One thing she said that I remember had a great impact on me was, "You will never grieve as much again." The problem is that I have become hardened to others' grief, and I don't want to do that. My heart has been broken before when my parents died, when my sisters died, when my father-in-law died, so I know what loss is, but Jason's death is the lingering pain that won't ease up.
Because of that I read the obituaries differently. When I see the name of a young person whose parents are still living, I feel a personal connection. In reality I am missing the opportunity to be a comfort and witness to others. Loss is real; whether it is a sibling, a parent, a grandparent, a cousin, a spouse--even a pet. I may have to work on squelching my own grief to be a comfort to others. The worst thing I could do is to minimize another person's loss. The fact is we all must face grief at some point, and grief is real. Pray for me that my heart will remain tender to others' pain. The last thing I want to do is hurt a person who if grieving.

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