Honoring Jason

We are facing the one year anniversary of Jason's death. I remember so well how much I accomplished one year ago tomorrow. I scrubbed my porch and washed down the front of the house, cleaned house, bought groceries. I have always loved days off when I can be home alone. I don't mean that to be mean to Tony, but when he's here, I don't get as much done.
Tomorrow morning I have a haircut scheduled for 8:30 and then I will probably go to get a pedicure, buy a few groceries, and go home to clean house. I was so busy last weekend that I didn't get much work done around here. Tomorrow night I will go to the football game to sell raffle tickets for the t-shirt quilt. We would like to sell enough that the amount we can give Mr. Blue and Mr. Capps will be of assistance for their incidental expenses.
Saturday we will head to Stillwater to tailgate, at Carson's house, and then go to the ballgame. We wanted to do something together that Jason would have liked. I have another goal. We haven't taken a family picture since last year. I just haven't been able to do it, so this weekend I'm going to.
The pain of thinking about each hour Sunday morning from 3:00 A.M. is horrible. It's odd; I have some memory blanks from some of the time right after his death, but not during those first days. My blanks are from after the funeral to Christmas. Sometimes I will see something or read something, and it will trigger a suppressed memory. Isn't that strange? You would think the blanks would come earlier.
My memories of him have been so vivid in recent weeks. Stories have come to my mind that I haven't thought of in a long time. Is this a gift from God so that I can remember him fondly?
Thank you God for my family and friends. Thank you for Jason and his roll as big brother, son, cousin, grandson, nephew and friend. Thank you for the phone calls, cards, and gifts from my family and co-workers. Thank you for giving your son and for receiving my son.