I'm gonna miss that smile

When Wayman Tisdale died of cancer last year, Toby Keith immediately wrote a song; he called it "Wayman's Song" but it became Jason's song to me the very first time I heard.
I’m gonna miss that smile
I’m gonna miss you my friend
Even though it hurts the way it ended up
I’d do it all again
So play it sweet in heaven
’Cause that’s right where you wanna be
I’m not crying because I feel so sorry for you
I’m crying for me.
That was one of the songs played at Brittany's funeral today, and it made me realize that of all the things I miss most about Jason, his smile is foremost. I love looking at his pictures and seeing a real smile, not a smile for the camera, but a smile that came from pure joy of living.
The pictures of Brittany were the same. The things they all had in common was a beautiful smile that told us that she loved life and loved the people she was with when the picture was taken.
I'm very sentimental today; it's Allison's 30th birthday, and she isn't here to celebrate, but I'm overjoyed because she has a new job that is a wonderful opportunity for her. She'll be home next week for a week, so we'll celebrate big time when she gets home.
Going to another young person's funeral has emotionally worn me out, but I'm later going to a birthday party for Bruce and Brian's 60th birthday. This is a huge event for us because it's the first of our friends to turn 60. How did it happen so soon? Just a fews days ago we were talking about turning 40.
We've been knocked around considerably in the past 20 years, but I'm so thankful for the friendship that we will celebrate today. Bruce's wife has been my very best friend since before I started to school. That's a long friendship.
While we are at the party, we will see friends that we haven't seen since Jason's death. That's always difficult for me, so if you read this between the hours of 3 and 8 today, say a prayer of strength for me. I'm kind of weepy today, and I don't want to put a damper on the afternoon.