Politics and Religion--not a mix.

I don't remember my Grandpa Rogers, Mom's dad. He died when I was 18 months old, but I heard stories about him. My dad used to say that G. P. (George Patton) loved to argue, especially politics and religion. Daddy, on the other hand, used to say that those were both subjects that you should stay away from in polite company. The last two weeks our Sunday School lessons have been on The Heaviness of Hatred and A Love Worth Giving. There have been so many thought provoking questions in the lessons that have made me repent for harboring resentment against people that I need to let go of. Some of the resentment has been because of my political beliefs that differ from some of the people that I work with and am acquainted with. I resent being told that you can't be a Christian and a Democrat; I beg to differ. I'm pro-life-- entire life. We shouldn't expect women to give birth to children because we think it is a sin to have an abortion and then expect that woman to "pull herself up by her bootstraps and take care of herself and the child." We need to use some of our taxes to educate or train her and to make sure the child she gave birth to has health care and an education. I believe in taxes for the greater good.
I'm very firm in my religious convictions; there is nothing I need to argue with anyone about because "I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that He is able to keep that which I've committed unto Him against that day." However, when you add today's climate of politics and religion together, there is much to argue about.
I'm really glad that Daddy and Jason are not here to witness the politics of the day.
My daddy was a yellow dog Democrat, and Jason was a Republican. I don't think they ever discussed politics, but if they had, Pa would have looked at Jason differently for the first time. My dad thought Jason was perfect and to find that they had different political beliefs would have rocked Daddy's world. Jason knew Daddy's convictions and believed that he was just a stuborn old man.
In the 80's politics and religion got combined when the Republican party (this is my opinion right now) decided they needed some more people. They had traditionally been known as the party of the wealthy, so they became aligned with the religious right and the gun control groups. We have seen several of the politicians who used the religious right to get elected fall in disgrace in recent years. God will not be mocked. I don't believe that all Republicans fall into this category, but if they are, they will be exposed. I have always been moderate in my political convictions, but as a public school teacher, I lean much closer to the Democratic party. I see too many of my students living in poverty under no fault of their own. I can't stand to think about a hungry child. I want to help them if I can, but the need is too great for me alone. I need the help of the nation. I'm overjoyed when one of the most impoverished students continues his or her education and become a contributor to society.
Again I believe firmly in taxes for the greater good, which is a principle of the Democrats. I converted completely to this ideology after my parents became retired and were old enough for Medicare. My mom spent two and a half weeks in the hospital before she died. She was in intensive care in St. Anthony's hospital for a week and a half. Because she had Medicare and a supplement, we paid absolutely nothing out-of-pocket. After she died, I took care of my dad's finances, medical care...everything. Dad spent his first night in the hospital when he was seventy--seven years before Mom's death. He had a heart attack, needed by-pass surgery, and because he had Medicare and a supplemental policy, he paid nothing out-of-pocket for this very expensive procedure. For some reason the amount 35,000 comes to my mind, but I'm not sure about that.
Two weeks after Mom died, Daddy had a stroke and then developed pneumonia. He spent several weeks in the hospital and needed a couple of surgical procedures to get him through that. Because of his stroke he could no longer work, so the VA started purchasing his medicine, hearing aids, glasses. Later in his life he had two knee replacements--requiring weeks of in-patient physical therapy, both eyes fixed because of cataracts, his esophogas stretched, two rotor rooter procedures, and a colonoscopy. Then he broke his hip and spent weeks in the hospital and rehab.
If I added all of the medical expenses of my parents together in a thirteen year period, the taxes my brother, my sisters, and I paid in would not have paid their medical bills. I became a patriot all over again then; I became so thankful to be American. All I had to do was watch news reports of people in other countries who needed medical care and had no access to it. I lived under constant stress for the seven years I took care of my dad. Allison still had two years of high school, and Carson was in middle school and early high school. Daddy died when Carson was a sophomore. I cannot imagine the added stress if we had had to worry about how to pay for the medical care my parents needed. Momma and Daddy had been good citizens, patriots. Daddy joined the Army during WWII, and Mom worked at Douglass AFB as a "Rosie" while also raising my oldest sister and my brother alone. My mom worked most of her life, except for a few short years when she stayed home when I was little. She mostly worked so that we could have insurance and for retirement because Daddy was self-employed. I would so have resented a government that turned its back on them, but I didn't have to.
Now back to the SS lessons. When I hear some state that you can't be a Democrat and a Christian, I get angry at the person. They are voicing an opinion, and just because that opinion differs from mine, I shouldn't resent that person-a person who is my Christian brother or sister.
Jesus gave a love worth giving. One of the things suggested in the lesson today was to take the scripture I Corinthians 13: 4-8. It's familiar to anyone who had attended a wedding in recent years; it's call the love chapter. Now see if you can put your name in the places where Love is. You certainly can put Jesus' name there, but I can't put mine.
Debbie is patient and kind. Debbie is not jealous, Debbie does not brag, and Debbie is not proud. Debbie is not rude, is not selfish, and does not get upset with others. Debbie does not count up wrongs that have been done. Debbie is not happy with evil but is happy with the truth. Debbie patiently accepts all things. Debbie always trusts, always, hopes, and always remains strong.
As a born-again believer, I can't be satisfied until that paragraph can be said about me. God has so much work to do to make me like Jesus. I have so far to go.

Are you ready for some football?

Tecumseh beat Noble last night 21-20, Go Savages!!!
The college season starts today, so here's today's schedule. Tony is on the golf course right now; I'm home stalling on my housework by playing on facebook, and reading and writing. I will finish the housework, go to the grocery and farmer's market, and then come home for a great day of tv football and food. I only watch two games. Tony, on the other hand, will watch as many as he can flip through the channels to keep up with. OSU has a 2:00 kickoff against Georgia Bulldogs; OU plays BYU at 6:00. Would I rather be at the games? Yes, but my husband is not a crowd person, so this is our compromise. We had season tickets for OSU for a few seasons when Carson was at South Rock Creek, but after he started playing high school football, it was hard to make sure we could go to the games. We were either too tired, or Carson was too sore, so we just started making Saturdays in the fall "stay at home and watch and eat something good" days.
I do plan for us to go to the OSU/Rice game on the 19th. That will be the weekend anniversary of Jason's death, so I want us to all be together to get through the weekend. I can't think of a better way to honor and remember Jason than to attend a Cowboys game.
We will probably cook at Carson's since he lives close to campus and just enjoy the gameday atmosphere in Stillwater. There's nothing like it.
I'm really missing Jason right now. He probably wouldn't have been here, but he would have called all day and texted all during the game. I wish they had cell phones in heaven. I would really like to talk to him right now. I've wondered if I would ever forget what he sounded like, but I don't have to worry about that. Carson sounds just like him on the phone. I never told them this, but for the last few years I've had to get into the conversation with them a little ways before I was sure who I was talking to. They both started every conversation with "Mom,..... What're you doing?"
I'll just sign off with "Go Pokes" from the entire Tony Humphrey family-all five of us.

Quilts

For the past two weeks a group of ladies have been meeting in the high school home ec room to make tshirt quilts for Mr. Blue and Mr. Capps and their wives. We have made five quilts in four nights. I think now that we have a system down, we could go faster if we all would do a few tasks at home. We have had a ball. We've laughed, and worked, and laughed, and visited, and laughed... Most, not all, of these women are my age or older with no kids at home. I think there is a void in our lives. Women need girls' nights sometimes, and the turnout we have had is evidence that there is a need in our community for something for us to do with our talents. Many of the women would come in saying, "Now I don't sew, but I want to help." So they would iron, cut out t-shirt fronts and backs, lay out the quilt design, pin the top to the lining. We all have had a fire kindled to make our own kids' shirts into quilts, and since it is so much fun to work together, we may meet to put together the quilts and help one another.
I have attended some women's Bible studies in the past, and I enjoy them very much, but there was something about working together for a cause that was very rewarding. I can study the Bible on my own, but I can't make five quilts in four nights alone.
I think I can understand the draw that women used to have to have quilting bees. Those women didn't have the means of communication that we have today, but they needed face-to-face interaction just as we need today.
All I know is that I'm gathering the t shirts for my kids' quilts because when we have another night, I want to be able to say, "My shirts are ready to piece together."

God still answers prayer

I realized after I reread yesterday's post that it didn't sound like I prayed for my kids any longer. Nothing could be farther from the truth. I even still pray for Jason. Dumb, huh? I don't pray for him personally; he is in heaven with no problems, no worries, no pain, no suffering. What I pray for is that his influence will continue to impact his friends and family here in this broken place. His death must be good for something. I want his friends and family members to think seriously about their fate.
As I posted yesterday, Mr. Blue is in Korea getting treatment for lung cancer. According to today's post, he may be coming home to continue treatment in the U.S. What an answer to all of our prayers. If he comes home when the doctor mentioned he might, he will have spent six weeks in Korea. Six weeks of expense, treatment, side effects, etc. all to possibly add years to his life, to be in remission, to spend more years with his kids and grandsons. Worth every bit.
I'm very frustrated that an American citizen has to travel 17 hours to get treatment. I don't know why Dr. Moon's treatments are not available here, but I suspect that it is too controversial to pass all of our screenings. It is stem cell treatment, but it is not any different than the type that is also done here. His own stem cells are harvested which is the same type of treatment that Tiffany Whittington is getting at MD Anderson. All I know is that the Blues have witnessed several people leaving Korea with hope, hope for healing from Parkinson's, alzheimers, cancer, and some have left with bad news and have returned home to spend time with their families. Since Mr. Blue was given no hope by any doctors in the US, he really only had two choices--go to Korea, or stay home and die.
Apparently, when the Blues have to see Dr. Moon three months after they leave Korea, they can meet him in the Bahamas or Grand Cayman. At least it's not a 17 hour flight. I've been impressed with the number of people who read Mrs. Blue's blog, all praying for them and sending encouraging messages of hope to them. Mr. Blue is such a private man; I'm sure this public information about his illness is very uncomfortable for him, but he is holding up because God is with him. I will keep praying for him

Appropriate, who cares?

I'm going to Hobby Lobby this afternoon to buy orange, black and white flowers to place on Jason's headstone. I already have some OSU stuff to put on it. It's time for OSU football, so the strange thing I'm going to do is decorate Jason's headstone with Go Pokes stuff. If I can figure out how to post a picture, I will (that's a hint for you Mel).
Thinking about cowboy football without Jason to talk to is rough. Of course, we've already been down that road because there was plenty of Cowboy football last year after Sept. 20th, but I really don't remember anything about those first few months. I had so much business to take care of, and my grief was so raw that I literally just went through the paces of each day.
I keep having people tell me that they pray for me every day. I am so humbled by that knowledge. I'm also ashamed of myself when I think about the people who have "dropped off" of my prayer list. I've learned so much about prayer this year. I will be the first to admit that I have become cynical about prayer. I prayed so hard for my sister Phyllis to be healed. When she died, I decided that God didn't change the course of someone's fate very often. I decided that our prayers didn't matter much. I used to write in a prayer journal each morning before Jason died. I haven't read the entries or written in it since his death. Every single morning I asked God to keep my children safe from physical, emotional, and spiritual harm, but he died in a horrible accident.
I have been praying for my bosses, James Blue and Roy Capps, who are both battling cancer. Mr. Blue's wife has been writing a blog daily that gives us specific things to pray for, Type A blood donors, Ensure, heating pads, relief from chronic cough, etc. and our prayers have been answered through the people who read her blog. Five blood donors on American military bases in Korea, Ensure of every flavor delivered to Seoul by a Korean missionary couple, 30-50 minute radiation treatments with no coughing and much needed rest for both Mr. Blue and his wife. I'm so honored to be a part of seeing God work through people.
Hearing that people continue to pray for us is humbling, but it does explain how we have not allowed our family to be destroyed by this tragedy. I'm going to be more diligent is keeping people on my prayer list longer. No matter what we face in life, it seldom ends as quickly as we would like. Illness, heartache, and tragedy have residual problems that linger long after the event is over. Thank you to all who have continued to pray for us. Don't stop now; September is going to be a challenge for our family. We need your prayers and God's blessings to flow.

Beautiful time of year--Can this really be August?

When I see anything advertised that is happening in August in Oklahoma outdoors, my first thought is always, "It will be so hot." Tonight I went to an outdoor concert at the park in Harrah. The band from Harrah Church where I attend was playing at the amphitheater. Talk about a perfect night. It was cool, but not too cool; there was no wind--in Oklahoma; the park looked green; the pond was full and still behind the stage; the mosquitos didn't even show up tonight. Because we were outside, the sound was perfect, not too loud. Perfection. I've been thinking so much about Jason lately. In just a few weeks he will experience his first birthday in heaven. I know time doesn't mean anything in heaven, but I have no other frame of reference to go by. Was tonight a glimpse of what he is experiencing all the time? Music that praises God in a perfect environment. I can only imagine.
Today I heard from a friend of Jason's who found me on facebook. He said that four years ago Jason gave his wife and son his horse, Charley. Charley is now 26 years old and living in Sweetwater, Oklahoma. That sounds like a good place to retire if you're a horse, doesn't it. I didn't really know where Charley was; the last I heard he was at Jason's ex-wife's family's place, and her niece was riding him. I really don't care where he is, I just like knowing he is being enjoyed by a kid.
My thoughts of facing September are consuming me right now. I keep thinking that at this time last year, I could still talk to Jason. Did I talk to him as often as I could? When he called, did I give him my full attention? I hope I did. I know that now when Allison and Carson call, I am attentive, interested in what they have to say, but have I always been that way? Life has taught me so much, but the biggest lesson I have learned is--While we are here on earth, nothing is as important as the relationships we have with those closest to us. They are God-given and God-blessed. Of course, our relationship with Him should be first and foremost in our hearts, but He expects us to share His love with our families.

Empty Nest

Several of my friends and relatives are experiencing the empty nest for the first time this week. I remember when my kids were still at home thinking that it would be so sad when we didn't have any kids at home and feeling sorry for my friends when that last kid moved out. I don't think you can prepare yourself for the changes this makes in your family. When Carson moved out, we had been parenting for thirty years. We were so young when Jason was born that we really couldn't remember life before kids.
Tony and I have adjusted very well. We have a routine that pleases both of us. We go out to dinner almost every Friday night (except I have to work the concession stand at the scrimmage tomorrow). We go to the grocery store every Saturday morning (except this Saturday when Tony will play golf). Get the picture. We can be flexible now. For thirty years our lives were under the rule of coaches, ag teachers, club sponsors, cheerleading coaches, youth leaders, homework, and employers. Now we do what we want, and we have become very selfish. I exercise several times a week because I can. I don't have to pick anyone up, drop anyone off, make sure someone eats before the night's activity. I can do laundry during the week or not. No one is going to go to a game with a dirty uniform.
I never realized I could get so spoiled.
I get to school every morning at 7:00 because I don't have to drop kids off, so I am ready for my work day to start at 8:00. I'm rotten.
I still have a good relationship with my kids. I don't see them as often as I'd like, but I talk to them several times a week. I miss the kids, but I don't miss the hectic life that having them live here involved. There is a reason we have kids when we are young. Right now if I do something on a school night, I try to be home early so I can be rested. When I think that I used to be out sometimes four nights a week during basketball season, I don't know how I did it.
Allison said last night that she feels guilty because my house always looks clean, so she thinks they were the ones that used to mess it up. It stays cleaner now because I'm home to pick up a little every day. There were some weeks when they lived here when we ran in, changed clothes, and ran out in a fifteen minute time period. By the time we would get home there was no time or energy to straighten, so cleaning was left for Saturday mornings.
I always worried that our busy life would adversely affect the kids, but I wouldn't trade the ballgames and activities for anything. We didn't waste much time on video games or television because we weren't home. One thing for sure; we were together.
Don't worry about the empty nest; it has its benefits.